Old Fools Journal: News from the Front

The front lines must have been just one street over last night as the artillery and rocket barrages were louder than the night before. It did not appear to be advancing in my direction so I thought to get some rest before we were overrun at dawn. There was mumbling and conspiring going on in the streets somewhere that I could hear but not see.  There was no advance at dawn so the combatants are probably waiting for supplies of ammo, beer and cigarettes.  I trust they will start again today celebrating the end of a bad year and the start of another, that will be just the same as the one ending, by blowing off their own fingers, ruining their ears and setting minor fires. So goes the war against excessive Chinese fireworks imports.

It has been fairly quiet this year but not because of the recovering economy I heard about the last time I listened to the radio. I'm guessing it's not recovering here as I know a number of young men that would like to have a job to no avail. Most of them can read, write (sort of) and  do simple arithmetic. Being a product of public education in Louisiana will not get them a good job flipping (you want fries wit dat) burgers and there is no rock quarry to take up the slack. The ones that have jobs usually spend it all on cigarettes, gasoline and pickup trucks. I never see beer among the young except for the bottles thrown in my yard so I assume they are doing drugs of some kind.   The good jobs stocking grocery store shelves goes to the laid off machinist, engineers and technicians so young men are roaming the streets in this first world country.  That puts them in the positions of being corrected by law enforcement officers which makes jobs in that field. Then with the help of some nine to five judges they fill the prisons so that there is work for the correction officers.  The growing jail industry is so good that our parish president wants to raid the library fund to build more jails.  So there is an upside.

We still need the library so the the teachers from the school next door have a place to go during the day to smoke cigarettes when school is in session but we only need the front of the building and the ash can.  No books are required. Those fat ladies gather around the front door huffing and puffing from the long walk of 300 feet and trying to get as much nicotine as possible in ten minutes. Talk about your "gateway drugs".

I expect the artillery to start again this afternoon once the ceremonial beers have been consumed. It's prudent to have a tin roof here to guard against rocket fire.

As for SWMBO (She Who Must Be Obeyed, my bride) and myself we survived the Jesus dollar days season by mostly ignoring it. We did not do anything and that was nice. We ate good, drank good wine, smiled at each other and managed to stay out of the stores. Staying out of the stores where  you are force fed seasonal music was the best part. In prior years a few hours of that music made me want to commit mass murder. Not this year. Someone else will have to fill in for "the Berserker". Not having seen or heard the "news" in several weeks I am only assuming that somewhere someone went berserk. I'm not going to check but I'm sure I'll hear about it.

I can't remember the last happy Commercial Christmas Holiday that I enjoyed. It has been more that twenty years I guess.  I am a slow learner but this year the decorations, lights, tree, presents and holiday music were not just eliminated they were ignored entirely.  It did not eliminate the stress but it moved it to a very manageable low level. The lack of  after holiday cleanup topped it all off. Instead of cleaning up I had a strong dark roasted Louisiana coffee with Louisiana cane sugar and a heavy shot of brandy.  Santa Claus still swirls around in my head and that communist Jew, Jesus, who I'm sure was a zen master, still influences my life without hindering it or having to believe all the made up stuff.

Good food, good wine and a warm house with loved ones (even the dumb ones) is good enough.

I have not given up writing but lately I have spent more time absorbing drivel instead of spewing it. I haven't found much good to pass on. It's kind of hard to say something amusing about some of the atrocious things people do to each other and to other species. I read and study dirt and the plants that grow in it daily so that when spring comes around I will be ready.

Meanwhile I'm playing with sprouting indoors in preparation with hopes of having some hardy new plants in the spring. Dirt is my friend.

Here is a little explanation of the major religions of the world that I can understand. Examining my meager understanding of man and his religions find this pretty much covers it.   I would give credit if I knew where it came from.

It's 75 degrees F outside so I think this afternoon I will be artisticly carressing some downed tree limbs with a chain saw.

Old Fools Journal: Firewood or How To Store Sunshine

It is a little know fact that Man when speaking shuts down his brain-Tom Swaim A little something came my way over the last couple of days just in the Saint Nick of time.

It's not much but it will do for now. This is "five times firewood". It kept me warm unloading it, it will keep me warm splitting it, it keeps me warm carrying it in, it keeps me warm when it's burning and it will keep me warm when I carry out the ash.

The storing of sunshine in the form of trees fascinates me. Without fail deep profound thoughts come to my mind when I handle it none of which I can remember when I come to write. That's okay because I know that just having those thoughts will give me a star on my life record.



Burning wood is not destruction it is conversion. Turn up the sound to hear this stove making like a rocketThis was a very tall old tree the wind pushed over. It became a nuisance to the people who lived under it  but while it stood they enjoyed the shade without a thought except for when they cursed it because of falling leaves.  To the woodcutter it was just another paying job. To the man who brought it to me it was money to buy a few packs of cigarettes. To me it is sunshine and is still living and providing. The remains of what you see in the stove will go into the yard where there are acorns taking root to replace it in it's growing form. Nothing is destroyed. Life goes on.

Speaking of life, Solstice has come and gone. It appears that those folks that throw the bones and bite the heads off frogs to make predictions have interpreted their findings. They think we get another go around old Sol even though there was no human sacrifice. I do hope I can make better of it in this journey than I did in the last one.

At least I get to start with my favorite fruit. These are the last of the fall tomatoes. Some are going bad instead of getting ripe but I'm eating homegrown tomatoes every day and soon I'll be starting seed indoors for the spring crop. This is not all of them. My hovel looks like a sequel to "The Invasion of the Killer Tomatoes".

These tomatoes have the thickest skin I've ever seen but they are full of juicy sweetness.

I am an amateur but what I lack in experience and know-how I make up for with patience  and perseverance.

Oh boy it's almost lunch time and I am craving fat. It seems I do that in winter. Whatever it will be will have tomato with it.



Knowledge is knowing that tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. -Jay Johnson

Old Fools Journal: Day of the Long Shadow

35mm taken in 1961 from the deck of a warship Winter Solstice is upon us again and I am glad to see it as usual. I get a twinge of regret and dread in summer at solstice but it is mitigated somewhat with knowing the remaining growing season is about to reveal itself. In my life that has always been more good than bad but after Samhain (Halloween) it's steeply downhill. At winter solstice I have a feeling of hope and elation without fail. It is somewhat subdued this year and I just want to get it over with. I realize that I have many blessings but the fog in my mind makes them difficult to see at times. I know the this too will pass if I grit my teeth enough.

We are under a tornado watch as I write this and it appears that Mother Earth is going to give us something to think about on this Winter Solstice day. The sun that makes us and all we experience on Earth possible started north this morning at 0530 GMT.  At least that is what is advertised but like all other years I will believe it when I see it. Since it is no longer possible for me to throw virgins into the volcano to appease the SunGod there is nothing I can do if it does not.

In my pagan mind I danced naked around the bonfire of last years troubles singing only in indecipherable tongues and grunts during the early morning hours to insure the suns return.  Honestly, this year I would like to have done it in the company of like minded beings of any species but being a "grove of one" makes that unlikely in any year. Maybe next year if I'm still around.

Happy Solstice, Prepare for Spring as it is coming.

Old Fools Journal: A Few Unfortunate Events

A few unfortunate events have occurred in the last couple of weeks that have caused the light in my head to go dark.

This is just one of them. No one was injured. That is not to say no one was hurt. What cannot be seen goes deep.
These events did not happen to me but they affect me. I have nearly shaken the medicine rattle to pieces.  Fortunately it is held together by the unseen.  I spoke to the tree elves, burn incense to the great spirit and finally retreated to the 'dark matter' in my mind. I'll be there for a while.

I was once ask by a friend , while discussing the amount of time I spent without human companionship, if I didn't get lonely? I have thought about that for about 35 years and the answer is No.  It always ends much like the picture above.

I'll not be in an undisclosed location. I will be instead under the bed with the monsters.  It is a safe place.

Old Fools Journal: Colonel Potter is dead, long live Colonel Potter

I know there were other officers in charge but Colonel Potter was the most important one to me. That was because he delivered some of the most aggressive messages on war, the insanity of war and the insanity of those who insist on war in the TV series "Mash".

I vaguely remember an interview when he was asked if he thought his performance in "Mash" (a thoroughly anti-war series) changed anything he said in essence that he did not know about that but he did know it certainly changed him.  It did not change me but it did cause me (I was already a commie, faggot, pinko, anti-war, peacenic hippy according to some) to think deeply  about it and I'm still thinking about it.  That character actor (Harry Morgan)  influenced  how I feel about it today.

Who would think that something so inconsequential as a TV show and a movie would have such an impact on ones life and philosophy?

Here is a song that also helped mold my young mind.


I used to think that those who grew up and matured in the '60's and 70's would bring us into the light but I see that they and their offspring have not done so. They have only deepened the darkness.
 

Old Fools Journal: December 7 Again....

Now, what am I supposed to be pissed about?  Seventy years is a long time to remember to be pissed off and I think I'll quit. I wrote this last year. Mostly no one knows what I'm talking about and I am starting to doubt that I do as well.

It turns out that we, the good guys, are just as bad as them, the bad guys.  I could give examples but I won't.

I thought when I was younger that by the time I got to this age I would be at peace with myself and the universe (whichever one I happen to be in) but I'm not. I am combating that by limiting my intake of stimuli. Even that has limited effect. Lately even reading Zen quotations pisses me off if I am not careful to limit myself to severe disappointment. Severe disappointment is debilitating enough but the alternative leads to anger then hate which gives me indigestion and gas. When I start farting I know I've gone too far.

My goal is to not become a quarrelsome, grumpy old man that reminds everyone of how it was done in "my day".  Now is "my day" and I don't much like it but I can't seem make it better.  The old "my day" is gone and can never be fixed or returned.

Oh well, life goes on, then you die.

Meanwhile the cats and dogs are bearing up in the cold very well with big fluffy coats and lots of stored fat. They are happy to see us everyday without fail.  My plants have not frozen yet and I'm having lettuce and tomato salads flavored with herbs from the garden everyday.  I can't seem to eat the greens as fast as they grow.

This lettuce is harvested everyday now and I still can't get ahead of it.

I can only eat mustard about once a week so a 5 gallon bucket of it is enough and Thaddeus bailed on me this year so he is no help.  It this does like last year I'll have greens until it gets hot again.

My rice bowl runneth over.

I'm starting more plants indoors (mostly herbs).  I know there is a Santa Clause but for children only.  If there was one for old men and I could sit on his knee I would ask for a green house big enough to live in.

As you can see here the wood shed is almost bare. Unlike the squirrels and the ants who have been busy preparing for winter I was like the grasshopper and  fiddling instead.



God has no religion.-Mahatma Gandhi.